


A Spin on Jabiim

by Pizza_Mia



Series: The Series Of Pure Crack [2]
Category: Star Wars Prequel Trilogy
Genre: Crack, Gen, Time Travel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-24
Updated: 2020-03-24
Packaged: 2021-02-28 22:35:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 912
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23294857
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pizza_Mia/pseuds/Pizza_Mia
Summary: The Force does a thing, and sends Obi-Wan Kenobi back in time.So, yeah. He dies on the Death Star (curse you, canon) and - bam! - he wakes up again. In Jabiim.As Asajj’s prisoner.He might have overreacted a bit.
Relationships: Obi-Wan Kenobi & Anakin Skywalker, Obi-Wan Kenobi & Asajj Ventress
Series: The Series Of Pure Crack [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1675261
Comments: 13
Kudos: 183





	A Spin on Jabiim

He was feeling quite content and peaceful, really. 

Obi-Wan allowed the beautiful, calm blackness to wash over him, and the last thing that he saw in his life was the crimson blade of Vader slicing into his ghostly body. He knew that it was petty of him, but he couldn’t help but take a slight satisfaction in the fact that, at least Darth Vader would not have the pleasure of seeing his dead body.

Hah, take that Anakin!

He seemed to float in nothingness for some time. He felt odd and weightless, just drifting there. If he could guess, he would say that he was in the nexus of the Force, the gateway between the dead and the living.

And then, it ended. The sudden yanking motion was abrupt and unexpected. He barely had time to cry out before this... blinding white light exploded all around him and, for a terrifying moment, he panicked completely. 

Logically, he knew that he was already dead. Nothing much could hurt him now, or so he hoped. 

Was he finally becoming one with the Force, his essence dispersing in the Cosmic Force? 

Most likely, but a nagging feeling inside him told him that that was not the case.

He felt his aching body jerking violently, before he opened his bleary eyes. It took him approximately half-a-second to realise that there was someone in front of him. He blinked, his vision suddenly sharpening into focus. He let loose some Huttese curses. 

"Sithin Hells!" He yelled. “Ventress, what are you doing here?"

———— ————-

Ventress was having a particularly bad day. She stormed her way to the holding cells in her castle in Ratatak. Time to have a chat with the prisoner. Ugh, she really hated Obi-Wan Kenobi. Partly because he was a Jedi, but mostly, because, well.... because he was Kenobi.

The one and only Jedi who tried to flirt with anything and everything that moved. Not to mention the sass.

So. Much. Sass. That it made her want to tear out her non-existent hair at times.

She pushed open the heavy, durasteel cell doors, pausing at the top and sparing an incredulous glance at the unconscious Jedi prisoner, who was curled up on the ground. Despite herself, her lip curled upwards in a small grin.

Aw, look at that. 

The Jedi was asleep on the floor. Snoring softly. How cute.

Oh well, time to wake him up. She made her way over to Kenobi and slapped him the the face. Hard. 

"Wake up.” She growled onto his ear, fingers curling around her vibro-blade.

She watched, faintly amused, as the Jedi jerked and opened his eyes. Kenobi blinked, and as soon as he caught sight of her, he suddenly spat out some very interesting curses and yelled. "Sithin kriffing hells! Ventress, what are you doing here?"

Ventress blinked, taken aback. Had the Jedi knocked his head too hard? Or was this some sort of trick?

She took a step back. "Kenobi, do you have a concussion? You are my prisioner, remember? Battle of Jabiim? Also, that was some very colourful curses. Do Jedi even curse?"

"Jabiim?" Kenobi said, very obviously confused.

"Battle of Jabiim. I captured you. Don't you remember?" Ventress said slowly, eyeing the Jedi.

Instead, Kenobi said the last thing she would have expected to hear.

"I'm dead." He said slowly, as if trying to convince himself. "You're dead."

"No, you are NOT dead and, the last I checked, neither was I.” She retorted, crossing her arms. "Are you crazy? Did you have a concussion?"

Kenobi was silent for a moment. "What date is it?" He suddenly asked.

She told him, rolling her eyes in exasperation.

"Impossible." He murmured.

"Honestly, Kenobi. You've only been here for two days." She told him, rolling her eyes. She jumped back a little, as the Jedi turned to look at her. 

"This is real?" Kenobi asked quietly, getting to his feet

"Yes, you're really my prisioner." She replied, watching him wearily.

————— ————  
Obi-Wan's mind was whirling. Somehow, he was back in the past. How had this happened? Though, he was willing to bet that this was the work of a Skywalker. He'd eat his lightsaber if it wasn't.

A sudden swell of joy and happiness took him by surprise. He was home!

He noticed Ventress watching him. Ventress. She was alive! He vowed that this time he would save her from Dooku. Gosh, he was so giddy about the fact that he had a second chance, he actually tackled the startled Dathomarian and hugged her gleefully. 

Ventress’s brain crashed.

————- ———-  
Something was seriously wrong with him.

What kind of Jedi would be glad at being captured? Even though a shitload of Force dampeners, Ventress could sense his sudden joy and happiness. Then he jumped up and HUGGED her.

"KENOBI!” She shrieked. “What the HELL is wrong with you?" 

(She very carefully did say it like ‘KENOBAEAUGUHGHA‘ . That was Maul’s line.)

The Sith sputtered, trying to push the obviously crazy Jedi away. “Are you on spice???"

"No," he replied, absolutely gleeful. "I'm back!"

The wave of emotion was so strong, so _potent_ , that Ventress actually turned around and fled from the cell, locking the door behind her. 

She stood there for a while, panting.

Still shaky from the sudden influx of all that light emotion, she took out her comlink, and called the Jedi Council straight. 

"Skywalker. You can take your Jedi Master back. Just make sure to keep him far away from me." 

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry, this was story was bugging me for weeks XD


End file.
